First Date Tips for Men
Wow… We will definitely cover a lot of techniques, tips and strategies for your First date Tips for Men and also Women.
When you think about things like romantic comedies, “chick flicks,” romance novels, soap operas, etc., what’s the first thing that comes to mind?
What do they all have in common (aside from the fact that they continue to generate multi-millions of dollars each year?)
The commonality among them is, women love them! Well, most women, anyway. And, even the small group of women that don’t like any of those things have still been conditioned – on some level, from a very early age, to respond to those triggers.
Women want to experience what the girl in that romantic comedy and romance novel experiences. (Sure, the modern woman may never admit to it in public…she may even deny it when asked about it. But deep down inside, she wants it just as much as any other girl.)
What is Dating – Wikipedia
Here’s what I am talking about…
Women are emotional creatures. (You’ve probably heard me say that several times in my various reports.)
So, when I say that women want to experience what the girl in a romantic comedy and romance novel experiences, I mean that they want to go through those same emotional peaks that the movies and novels are able to take them through. (That is why so many women are addicted to romance novels.)
Women want to feel like their romantic life is unfolding like a story out of one of those movies or novels. They want to feel those serendipitous moments that remind them of the possibility of “meant to be” and “it’s a sign”….or even true love, soul mates, destiny and fate.
They want the ups and downs, like the thrill of a roller coaster ride. They want to be swept off their feet. They want to feel like they’re falling, somewhat out of control, and they can’t help themselves…but they like the direction it’s headed towards.
They want to feel brand new, like it’s their first time experiencing all of it. They want to feel like a teenager falling for the first time. Or even a little girl who doesn’t have any fears or walls/barriers, so she can give in to those feelings completely…and let it consume her.
They want the excitement and nervousness of that first Date and that first Kiss. They want to feel those incredible moments of ‘connection’ with a stranger. They want the humor, the romance, the spark, the butterflies in the stomach.
Yes…they want it all.
But…they want it to feel like it’s all happening naturally. (At least, that’s what they want on the surface level of their consciousness.) They want to feel that sense of natural ‘romantic’ flow…where one thing leads to the other. And, before they realize it, they’re in your arms… feeling turned on, comfortable, safe…ready to fully unleash the woman inside of her, that’s been dying for a man to make her feel this way.
Phew… sounds like a heck of a lot, doesn’t it? But hey…they want what they want.
Are women foolish to want all of that? Yes and no.
Yes, because the average guy (and most guys) doesn’t have a clue how to give women all of those experiences. And… No, because there are a small group of guys out there, that have learned how to give women exactly that kind of experience.
And you, my friend, are about to become one of those rare guys.
I am going to reveal some very cool, and effective, strategies in this report – including some powerful seduction tactics, that will help you to give women just that kind of experience.
And, I am going to show you how to give women a big part of this experience from their very first date with you. In other words, you’re going to give them their “best date ever!”
Because, let’s face it…the first date is where it all begins. It can make or break what happens next.
If you give her an incredible time, she will want to see you again and continue to take the relationship forward. (If you give her the usual – or even a bad date – well, you already know what road that leads to.)
Okay…I will start with some of the basics and fundamentals first. And, I will continue to build on those fundamentals as I share the rest of the game plan – including those powerful ‘romantic seduction’ processes (which will come later.)
First of all, let’s talk about what you should not be doing…
Don’t Go Overboard
First date Tips for Men
Yes, you want to impress her, you want to give her an amazing experience that she will look back on fondly.
But…don’t forget the fact that you have to start out by going on a first date. (Without that, you can’t get to the other dates.)
So…don’t go overboard with the first date. As I touched on above, if you make it too elaborate or over-the-top, you will scare her away.
Again, keep in mind, she’s not your wife or even your girlfriend. You’re not giving her a 5-year anniversary date here.
If you want any of the above to be a possibility in the future, or even if you just want to see her again after that first date, you must not do anything to scare her away nor make her feel “creepy.” (You never want to make a woman feel creepy. That is the kiss of death.)
That means you do not want to have a flock of doves flying out of anything. No smoke messages or banners passing by, upon the sky. Don’t show up to her front door with an entire flower garden.
And, don’t do the “candlelight dinner while Barry White plays in the background” either. Save that stuff for future dates. It’s really not “first date” stuff. She hardly knows you at this point. And besides, doing that kind of stuff will make her wonder about your motives and intentions.
Yes…you do want to show her that you made an effort, that you care about her enough to not just wing it. But, don’t make her think you’re about to propose to her.
I’m sure you get the idea. I am going to give you specific examples of what you can do, later in the report anyway. So don’t worry. After you’re done reading this report, you’ll have a pretty good idea of what to do, and what not to do.
Now, let’s talk about the overall process of what you should be doing…
Give Her A Story
First date Tips for Men
As I’ve touched on earlier, women want to feel the same way they do when they watch one of those great romantic comedies, ‘chick flicks,’ or what they read in a great romance novel. But, they want to feel all of that for real.
They want to experience the same thing personally and have it unfold in their own lives…with a real guy.
So, let’s talk about what it is, about a great movie, that makes such a huge emotional impact on people… in this case, women.
For starters, a great movie tells a great story. And every great story has a plot…it has an interesting beginning, an ending that leaves you satisfied…but most importantly, it has lots of chapters in between.
And, each new chapter is like a mini-story in itself. Each new chapter gives the woman a new emotional high and a slightly different experience. It shows her something new, or it reminds her of a past significant moment.
Note: Not all of the above emotional peaks in these chapters are positive ones. Some are negative ones. They can make her sad, or upset, make her miss a past experience, or remind her of a heartbreak.
And, believe it or not, those negative emotional peaks are just as important to have in a good story. That is, as long as each of those negative emotional peaks is followed by a positive one – that lifts her back up again!
And, each time that she gets lifted back up again, she goes even higher than the last time. (If you can understand that one concept alone, your persuasive and seductive powers can skyrocket. But, perhaps that stuff is best suited for another report.)
So, during just one story, the woman gets to feel happy, sad, excited, romantic, heartbroken, attraction or even lust, laughter, serendipity, loneliness, the prize (for him,) angry, fulfilled, and more. And… she gets to feel all of those different emotions within a span of two hours!
First date Tips for Men
Again, all of the above may seem like a tall order…and a lot to give her on the first date. But there are ways to do it.
The easiest way to give her a similar feeling of a story unfolding is to break your date up into “events,” i.e. mini beginnings and endings. And, each event will be somewhat different from the previous one.
Therefore, instead of taking her out to just dinner (or even dinner and a movie – which is a safe bet, and can work if done right,) you could go to several locations, that have different things to offer…including different atmospheres, moods, experiences, and yes, different emotional reactions.
You could start at a bar, pub (or restaurant) just for drinks, first. Then, go to (another) restaurant for dinner. Then take a short walk from there, on your way to a nice, local gelato (or another dessert) place.
Just that simple change shown above can make a huge difference in upgrading your date. (But, don’t worry, there’s a lot more I will share with you.)
You could even add in the dinner and movie aspect to the above “events” list. But… instead of doing the usual “dinner and a movie,” switch things up. Go to the movie first!
So, you could catch an early showing of the movie before dinner. That way, you could have lots to talk about during dinner, even if you couldn’t think of anything else to say besides talking about the movie. That can take a lot of the pressure off the usual dining experience where you’re both a bit nervous and want the date to go well…and can’t think of anything interesting to talk about.
Also, by seeing the movie first, you will both already have something in common (the movie) even before you start talking to each other. You would have already started the date off by having a “shared experience” (which is very important in bringing two people closer.) You would have exciting moments to talk about, jokes to share, and even silly moments to laugh at…all from the movie that you just watched together.
Important: If you do decide to go to a movie as part of your date, do not pick a romantic comedy. I realize that sounds like the opposite of what this strategy is about – but it’s not. The reason is, you don’t want her to be thinking about anything that resembles “dating disasters,” “awkward moments,” or even relationship challenges while she’s sitting next to you – especially on the first date.
It would be a lot better if you took her to watch something exciting and explosive, like a popular thriller. That way, she can come out of the movie feeling excited, thrilled, elated, etc. (And…you’ll have lots of stuff to talk about, also related to that movie, i.e. those emotions.)
Note: If you don’t want to, or can’t afford to pay for dinner at an expensive restaurant, that’s just fine. Pricey restaurants are kind of ‘played out’ for first dates anyway. It’s much better to be more casual as far as dining goes. (Besides, if she just wants to get an expensive dinner out of you, you probably shouldn’t waste your time on that kind of woman anyway.)
The same goes for the other activities that make up your date as well. They don’t have to cost a lot, especially if you don’t want it to. Just pick a few different low-cost but fun things to do. (The keyword is fun. Your goal is to get her to experience a few different positive emotions.)
Here’s another major bonus for taking her through multiple events during the same date…
By naturally moving her from one location to another, and creating these mini beginnings and endings multiple times, her mind will – on some level – view each new location as another date!
In other words, after you’ve taken her through these mini events, she will feel like she has gone out on several dates with you. That means, you would have speeded up time in her mind! And, she would feel a lot closer to you now than she would have after going to just one location, i.e. one date. (Pretty clever, eh? 😉
Okay…let’s build on that.
Laughter, Fun, Uniqueness
First date Tips for Men
Whenever a large number of women are surveyed, they always put “sense of humour” as one of the top qualities they look for in a mate. A guy that can make a woman laugh usually ends up winning the “date race” against other, seemingly more successful (even better-looking) men.
Laughter has the amazing power to open up a woman, to let her easily drop down her defences, let down her hair, and just have fun – and enjoy the moment to its fullest. And when they can have more fun while you’re around, they will associate the act of “having fun” with you.
I have an entire report, titled “Laugh Her Into Bed” that lays out a step-by-step plan of how to seduce women with laughter, which you may want to check out.
For the purposes of this report, it would help if you 1) came to the date with a fun, playful state of mind, and 2) came prepared with some hilarious jokes and stories to sprinkle into the overall conversation and interaction of the evening.
Of course, make sure that the jokes and funny stories are not offensive, i.e. no religious, political, racial, gender-biased stuff. Test your material out on other women if you want to be sure they would pass the ‘non-offensive’ test. (Or just get my other report and nail this down.)
Aside from laughter, you would also want to introduce some aspect of fun and games.
A great – and simple – way to do that is to play games which puts “you and her” against “the rest of the world.” It allows you to create a “secret” and private world with her that only the two of you share and know about. (This is also a great way to create another “shared experience” – which I will talk more about soon.)
For example, while you’re having dinner at a restaurant (or wherever there are other couples around,) you can play the game called “Who’s On Their First Date,” or if you’re more daring, “Who Just Got Some.”
The object of the game, as the names suggest, is to look at the couples around you and guess as to which of them are on their first date, and then explain your reasons….or… guess as to who among them have just had sex, and once again explain why you think so, as well as how recently you think they did it.
You can make these games a lot more fun by picking the oddest, most unlikeliest couples – and then try to explain to her (your date) why you think they are the most likely candidates. It’s almost
a guaranteed way to make her laugh. (Example: An old (70+) couple where your reason would be that “the man happens to be grinning or colourfully dressed,” etc.)
A lot of fun can also be had by taking your date to a carnival – or by making one of the “events” of your date be a visit to a carnival.
A carnival can offer several emotional peaks. First of all, it is a place filled with fun and games, including foods/snacks, activities and experiences that you don’t get to enjoy on a regular basis. It can also bring about the feeling of nostalgia.
But most importantly, a carnival is a place that appeals to the kid inside her. It gives her permission to put her worries, cares, insecurities, hang-ups and walls aside and to just be a kid again – and just have fun.
And, if she allows herself to be comfortable enough around you to just let go and have fun, she will begin to feel a closeness and connection with you that usually takes several dates, weeks or even months to bring about.
Packing a basket and going for a picnic, watching a show at the park, going ice-skating, etc. can all be fun activities – either as the actual date or as one of the events during the date. (Obviously, I recommend the latter.)
Of course, be mindful of the specifications of such activities.
For example, you wouldn’t want to have a picnic in an overly secluded/isolated area that’s too far away from civilization. And, you probably wouldn’t want to have it in the dark, or too close to sunset. (Because, you wouldn’t want her to fear for her safety or wonder if you’re a serial killer or something…even for a split second.)
Introducing her to something new can usually be a good idea…provided it’s not too ‘out there’ and doesn’t make her feel stupid, insecure, or otherwise make her look bad in any way.
Also, if you decide to pick something that requires some physical exertion, i.e. any physical activity that may get her sweating or may require her to have appropriate attire and gear (like ice-skating,) it may be wise to find out how she feels about such things beforehand. (She may just not be the type who wants to perspire in front of you, especially on her first date.)
Another great, and somewhat unique, activity to do with her is to do an open house tour (or two.)
The great thing about the above is, it will give you lots of interesting things to talk about and discuss – as you’re walking through a house that probably belongs to somebody else, i.e. it will give you an idea of what the residents’ tastes and sense of style are. And, the two of you can start discussing any or all of those things.
In addition to the above, doing an open house tour can also get you both to revisit past memories. You can talk about what it was like for you as kids, growing up. Or it can open up conversations about each other’s families. All of these subjects and discussions can bring the two of you closer. You will come across moments where you feel a connection with each other.
You can even combine the above activity with the “fun and games” aspect. For example, you could pretend (to the tour guide) to be a couple looking for their first home. You could even tell her beforehand to “just follow my lead” or to “play along” as you go into the home(s) and start telling these ‘fictional’ stories to the tour guide/realtor, about who you both are, what you do, etc.
You may want to check out the papers/listings beforehand (i.e. before your date) and pick different styles of homes (and in different price ranges) and just see what kind of conversation emerges as the two of you take the tour(s.) You will get to learn a lot about each other as you go through these different styles of homes.
You may once again find yourselves naturally discussing each other’s tastes, goals, future plans, etc. which will (again) create a bonding experience, bring you closer, and make you feel more comfortable and connected with each other.
First date Tips for Men
“First date Tips for Men”
Important: When I say ‘future plans,’ I don’t mean that you should talk about when you want to get married or how many children you want to have, etc. That’s a bit too much for the first date. So, don’t bring that stuff up unless she does and/or starts to ask you questions about those things.
Other activities that are unique and/or create a sense of adventure, thrill, or even a hint of danger (without actually being dangerous) can be fun as well. Anything that gets her to have a peak emotional experience would be good.
You could enjoy a ferry ride and have a picnic (or dinner) on the ferry itself.
Race cars, go-carts, hot air ballooning, etc. can all be great if done safely. (Of course, you would never want to force her or try to convince her too hard about trying something that she really doesn’t feel good about. And, as mentioned earlier, have backup plans/activities ready.)
A great way to add the emotions of thrill, adventure, and even danger (without actually being dangerous) is to take her on one of those 3D illusion rides – if you have one in your area – where she’s flying over cities at high speeds or is being shot into space, etc.
(Obviously, you’d want to find out in advance if she has a fear of heights, has any allergies, or tends to get seasick, motion sick, etc. so you can avoid doing any of those activities.)
Mood, Atmosphere, Ambiance
“First date Tips for Men”
As you take her through these different locations or events, you will also take her through a range of moods/atmosphere/ambience as well as scenery changes. And each one will have a slightly different effect on her.
For example, a bar, pub or night club may be loud, crowded and lively…the restaurant may be quieter and romantic…the museum may be sophisticated and uplifting…a carnival may be loud and crowded but with (obviously) a completely different feel than a pub…the dessert place may be fun, bright, and decadent…and so on.
Please understand that this is not just about doing a bunch of different things with her. Sure, that would beat the pants out of a regular ‘dinner and movie’ date. But, a more powerful strategy is to choose those different things – or events – wisely, so that each one can impact her in different ways emotionally.
Remember, humans (especially females) are driven by emotion. Everything else is just a means to that end.
When women receive gifts such as flowers or jewellery, it’s not so much the actual items that they love. It’s how those items make them feel. And, it’s how they act of receiving those items makes them feel.
In the end, it’s all about emotions. The more she can feel certain emotions during her date with you, the more meaningful and memorable the date (and you) will be for her. The more she will tend to talk it up to her friends. (And, her friends will, in turn, reinforce her mentally about “how amazing” you are.)
Also, for these emotions to have the most impact on her, it’s important to take her through a series of emotional changes, ups and downs…and even highs and lows (if you know what you’re doing.)
Women love to experience serendipitous moments, especially when it’s related to romance, love, and/or relationships. They love to come across “happy accidents” and “pleasant surprises,” and they can often view these events as significant moments…not just in the scope of the date but in their life as well.
I remember a show where a guy took a woman out on a date. And as they were walking down a dirt path out in the country, they noticed an old bicycle propped up against a tree. And no other human seemed to be around, for miles. So, the man (being spontaneous) suggested that the two of them go for a ride on the bicycle. And, they had a fun, slightly mischievous time doing that.
It may not seem like a big deal to you, or to most guys, but to a girl who’s out on a first date with a guy, that little bicycle ride falls in the category of a “pleasant surprise” or a “happy accident.” And, whenever she remembers that first date, you can bet that she will remember that entire, somewhat strange incident of finding an abandoned bike (as if being placed just for them) and being spontaneous about having fun riding it.
I have personally experienced something cool during a hike, where a deer came out of the woods and approached us, looking for food. Within a minute, 2 of her little ones followed, and then the pappa deer, with the big horns came trotting along as well. Within minutes, we were surrounded by an entire family of deer. It was amazing, exciting, and a little scary…all at the same time. (Talk about experiencing emotional peaks!)
It doesn’t have to be a huge, life-changing moment. Just something that is unexpected, somewhat impactful, and happens to make the day – and experience – a little bit better.
Now…I’m not going to suggest that you manufacture a moment like this and secretly slip it into the course of the date. But, I do know of situations where some men (and even women) have done just that, in order to give their date a touch of that ‘serendipitous’ are.
First date Tips for Men
Most guys are anything but subtle. And, most of them think they are subtler (or quicker, sneakier) than they really are.
To make matters worse, women happen to be very good at reading body language. So, even when you may think you were being subtle, there’s a very good chance that she noticed you sneak a peek at the waitress’s chest as she leaned over…or her butt as she walked away from your table.
You know what I’m getting at, don’t you…
When you’re out on a date with a woman, one of the worst things you can do is to check out other women around you – whether you do it on purpose or by accident. A much worse thing still is to actually flirt with other women, including your server, while your date is right there. (It’s not easy to recover from something that bone-headed.)
On the other hand, one of the most captivating things you can do is to give her your undivided attention.
My advice to you, when you’re out a date with a woman, is to make her your world. Forget for the night that other women even exist. Don’t let those other women have any power over you.
Now, let me be clear… when I say “make her your world,” I don’t mean that you should stare at her the entire night without blinking – or hang on her every word. That would put you in the “creepy” category. And, you never want to be in the ‘creepy’ category. (That would be the opposite of what we’re trying to accomplish.)
What I mean is, give her the night. Give her that slot of your time. And give her your undivided attention. Listen to her – really listen to her. Try to get in touch with who she is on the inside. Forget about how hot she may look on the outside while she’s having an actual conversation with you, and really try to get to know who she is as a person.
You will impress the heck out of her by doing so, especially because most guys never do this. They’re either half-listening to her and half trying to look down her blouse, or they’re looking around at everybody else except her, or they’re fiddling around with their cell phone (which is incredibly annoying for women.)
And, yes, most guys are also blatantly checking other women out. So, beware…when you’re out with a woman, other women will try to get your attention or pretend to flirt with you.
For some women, the only way they can get a brush to their ego is to get your attention and make you squirm and/or to try to make your date feel jealous, insecure, etc. by getting you to give them your attention instead of to your date. Don’t fall for it.
Also, your server may very well flirt with you too. Probably not because she wants you. But because she either 1) needs a brush to her ego, 2) wants to get a bigger tip from you, or 3) both of those reasons.
Let me repeat…do not fall for it! Especially if you want your actual date to go well.